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From The Counseling Center: Be, Do, Have

Pictured: Virgil Roberson

By Virgil Roberson, Executive Director, The Counseling Center

June 4, 2025: In life we often aspire to do and have many things – whether it is doing wonderful work in our careers, families or activities, or attaining something we really want or need.

Doing and having meaningful things can truly be one of the most palpable indications of progress in our eyes and society.

DO. HAVE.

We can trip ourselves up, however, if we live our lives in the DO, HAVE, then BE scenario. Meaning, we can only fully enjoy or relax AFTER the doing and having.

When we prioritize doing and having, we focus on results and fortify our sense of self from the outside in, which can feel fleeting. When we allow ourselves to prioritize being, we can slow down and hear what our true self (our BEING!) may be calling to us.

So to refocus, recenter, and just BE, begin by trying some of the following:

-Breathe: Sit still quietly without an agenda for 5, 10, or 20 minutes each day. Simply observe your thoughts, feelings, day dreams

-Put yourself in nature: Take in the breeze, feel the sunlight, touch the raindrops, listen to birds chirping, smell the air around you. Use your senses

-Move: When walking or exercising, allow yourself to be present with your body–in each muscle, heartbeat, sensation—aware of the tactile resonance of your being.\

Prioritizing how to BE each day can reorder one’s life. The doing and having will follow in alignment when it starts from the grounded place of your organic self.

The Beatles famously paired the phrases, “Let It Be ” and “There will be an answer.” Similarly, let yourself be, and your answers will follow.

In the busy-ness of life, it can be helpful to remind ourselves that we are human beings, not human doings. And the more connected we are to being, the more we come to know that we are enough, even if the results of doing and having feel like ever-moving targets.

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